Author: Anthony Abatte
The Counselor has all the makings of a blockbuster crime-drama. A star-studded lineup, Ridley Scott (Gladiator, Prometheus) directing and a Cormac McCarthy (writer, No Country For Old Men) story. Sadly, all of these ingredients are thrown together in a boring, jumbled mess.
The Counselor (Michael Fassbender) is a wealthy, successful lawyer that decides to make money via drug-trafficking. Despite warnings from his paranoid, middle-man Westray (Brad Pitt), Counselor (which is the only way he’s referred to in the entire film) moves forward and things go horribly wrong.
Both The Counselor movie and character prevent their own success with awful decisions. The movie is almost two hours but drags on with stretches of awful dialogue. Reiner (Javier Bardem with another weird hairstyle) suggests the Counselor try the drug trade, while sharing his feelings on his girlfriend, Malkina (Cameron Diaz). He remarks that he can’t trust her because “she’s a woman” and women have “got their own agenda”.
Reiner has a conversation with Malkina and asks if she’s “really that cold”, to which she responds “the truth has no temperature”.
Okay….am I missing something?
The characters are rich with money and words, but make the poorest mistakes. The Counselor ignores warnings of how cartels violently handle problems and is later shocked that they hunt him when things go south. Brad Pitt’s Westray seems like the only sensible person, bragging about having backup plans. Later, he loses his cool over a sexy woman in an airport, allowing her to access his most personal information.
I’ve seen kids in horror movies make better decisions.
Cameron Diaz is the biggest standout, as the hyper-sexual, devious Malkina. She owns leopards, has leopard spot tattoos and cat-eye makeup that is so heavy, she looks like a rejected Disney villain. As if her Catwoman look wasn’t enough, she has the most memorable, ridiculous, non-violent scene in the entire film.
She seduces a car. There’s really no better way to put it. Cameron Diaz mounts a convertible and does a routine that strippers would laugh at. It’s meant to be seductive but it’s the biggest “What the f$%^” moment I’ve had in a theater all year.
Halfway through The Counselor, I was bored with long speeches, grossed out by the excessive violence (including a decapitation and a very graphic scene involving a man’s neck being sliced in public) and didn’t care about any of these people. I just kept wondering how these characters were so wealthy but they couldn’t buy any brains to make smarter moves. The movies’ random cuts to different locales across the world seemed pointless and added another distraction.
I’m not sure if Cormac McCarthy’s book is the same but he did write the screenplay. Ridley Scott’s previous film, Prometheus, left me with some of the same “why are they doing this?” moments. The Counselor crawls through pointless scenes, awful dialogue and no real payoff. I only wish I’d been advised against seeing it. If you want to see people make bad drug decisions with a compelling story, watch Breaking Bad.
Rating 3.5/10Read More
Movies based on comic book properties are now as common as the use of special effects and 3D. Not every comic book movie has superheroes in tights and capes though. 2 Guns may be based on a comic book but it’s an homage to buddy cop movies.
Based on Steven Grant’s book, 2 Guns is the story of DEA agent Bobby Trench (Denzel Washington) and Navy Intelligence Officer Michael “Stig” Stigman (Mark Wahlberg). Neither man knows the others’ true identity until they try to arrest each other.
As the story unfolds, both men realize they can’t trust their organizations and reluctantly band together. Through a series of car chases, gunfights and explosions, they run from former partners and drug lord Papi Greco (Edward James Olmos).
Washington and Wahlberg have great chemistry as a duo and keep things light-hearted. Denzel, after his dramatic Oscar-nominated performance in last year’s Flight, seems to have fun in this role. Mark Wahlberg channels his earlier work in The Big Hit, kicking ass and cracking jokes.
Bill Paxton’s plays Earl, a dark, violent man tracking the two for undisclosed reasons. Earl interrogates with threats of Russian Roulette and takes himself very seriously. Paxton is interesting as a bad guy but almost too silly to believe.
Paula Patton (Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol) plays Deb, Bobby’s sometimes girlfriend and DEA partner. She’s really eye candy, instead of the badass agent she was in Ghost Protocol. James Marsden (X-Men) also plays Navy officer Quince, a superior to Stig with his own motivations.
Almost every character in 2 Guns has a hidden agenda, leading to some twists, turns and double crossing in the plot. A lot of it is quite predictable but the movie never pretends to be anything more than a bullet-filled comedy.
We never find out how these two guys came together and it’s quickly glossed over in the film. I think a little back story would have been interesting but it’s a minor detail that’s forgotten once things get rolling.
The action in 2 Guns is standard but fun. A car chase leads to a comical fist fight between Stig and Bobby. Gunfights are shot well except for the finale. There are so many weapons that the end results are far too ridiculous to not laugh at.
2 Guns never really does anything new. It’s a movie that’s been done several times. Fans of the Lethal Weapon and Bad Boys flicks will enjoy this but there’s nothing that will make you want to revisit it.
Summer is almost over but we still have a strong month of films to look forward to. Let’s close out August with the Guys Girl Summer Movie Preview!
(Denzel Washington, Mark Wahlberg, Paula Patton, Bill Paxton)
+ A DEA agent and a Navy officer are caught in a double cross involving millions of dollars.
+ Based on a comic book series by Steven Grant
+ Two of Hollywood’s most charismatic leading men, action, and humor
Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters
(Logan Lerman, Alexandra Daddario, Stanley Tucci, Nathan Fillion)
+ Based on Rick Riordan’s books, this is the 2nd Percy Jackson adaptation
+ Looks more action packed than first movie
– Not sure how close to the book the movie will be
– Still getting Harry Potter comparisons
(Matt Damon, Jodie Foster)
+ Latest from Writer/Director Neil Blomkamp (District 9)
+ Sci-fi story where wealthy class live above Earth in Elysium, while poorer people are left on desolate Earth
+ Blomkamp did a great job with District 9, on a small budget. Elysium costs $100 million and looks more interesting than films with twice that budget
We’re The Millers
(Jason Sudeikis, Jennifer Anniston, Emma Roberts, Ed Helms)
+ A fake family is assembled to ship weed from Mexico to the U.S.
+ Apparently Jennifer Aniston is frozen in time to look like she’s still 25. Or, she works out like crazy.
– Doesn’t look very funny. Trailer might ruin TLC’s “Waterfalls” song for you
– Except for Jennifer Aniston looking amazing, none of the trailer is memorable
(Dane Cook, Stacy Keach, Brad Garrett)
+ A crop dusting plane is afraid of heights but wants to compete in a race. (So, Turbo in the air?)
– Disney originally intended this to be straight to DVD
– Spin-off from the world of “Cars” but supposedly NOT made by Pixar
– Looks like Disney is selling more toys than tickets with this one.
(Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Chloe Grace Moretz, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Jim Carrey)
+ Sequel to Mark Millar comic book movie about real-life heroes
+ Looks just as violent and funny as the first
– Jim Carrey has publicly spoken against the violence in this film. Did he not see the first one or read the script?
(Harrison Ford, Gary Oldman, Liam Hemsworth, Amber Heard)
+ Harrison Ford’s dramatic performances in his older age have been better than his action movies. Crystal Skulls anyone?
(Ashton Kutcher, Josh Gad, J.K. Simmons)
+ Biopic about tech mogul Steve Jobs
+ Ashton Kutcher’s performance looks interesting
– Wonder how much liberty Hollywood takes with the script. Hoping for more real events than “reel” ones.
The World’s End
(Simon Pegg, Nick Frost, Martin Freeman, Rosamund Pike)
+ From the crew that created Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz
+ Five friends on a pub crawl notice something strange about their hometown.
(Sharni vinson, Nicholas Tucci, AJ Bowen)
+ The Davison family gets attacked by strangers with creepy masks
+ Looks similar to The Strangers, which could be a VERY good thing
(Ethan Hawke, Selena Gomez, Jon Voight, Paul Freeman)
+ A man must stay behind the wheel of a car to save his kidnapped wife
+ Ethan Hawke’s career has been revived in a big way
– Selena Gomez looks very out of place in the trailer
That’s all folks! We have a few weeks of blockbusters lined up. Keep it here on Guys Girl for your entertainment news! See you at the movies!Read More
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Since 2009, GuysGirl has become the voice for the female fan covering national topics on major sports, entertainment, and their surrounding culture. Through our editorial features, radio, livestream and TV broadcasts, we promote the on and off the field lifestyle of the female fan.
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Blythe is a former sports and entertainment broadcaster who quit it alllllll in order to dedicate more time to her growing digital brands. As a solopreneur based in Jacksonville, Florida, this podcast highlights the ups and downs of managing a side hustle in hopes it can lead to that elusive work/life balance.